So I’ve been saying A LOT that this week has been a struggle. I can genuinely say that it is NOT just me. This was confirmed by a SIGNIFICANT regression in Dekker’s potty training. I think he had five accidents today, one of which was not a little one, but the whole shebang. Peed everywhere. Not my best day, and a really difficult way to start it out. But I tried hard to roll with it, and did some laundry and made it into a normal day.
After a rough start, it was a relief to have my mom drop by with some groceries to help assemble a few things for Laela’s party snacks. She let me take all the time I needed before helping me get my motivation up to get in the kitchen. We then worked together and baked up a nice batch of mini cupcakes for Laela’s party.
We got all of that done, and that was about where I capped for the day. Brady luckily made it home before mom left, which doesn’t always happen. They tend to just miss each other, so this was SO nice to all be together. However, when she left, Brady sent me away to rest and he got the kids some food and took care of a few things. I couldn’t be more thankful for him, really.
Another small but beautiful point of the day is that, among Dekker’s struggles and attitude today, he is trying to be so sensitive to me. He knows I’m struggling harder than usual right now, and he is very understanding. I surfaced from my room to use the washroom, and as soon as Dekker saw me, he said “Mommy, I’m so sorry that you’re so tired. You had a hard day. You ok?” I just love that sensitivity comes so naturally to him. I have beautiful children.
So really, in the midst of an incredibly hard time for us, there are little upsides to be found everywhere! These days, I feel like I have to look a bit harder for them, but then I do. I know they’re there. And likely, soon enough, they’ll be clearer to me. I just need to remember that they exist, whether I have to work to find them or not. Feel free to remind me if I’m a total downer for too much longer.