You Know the Balance I Mean

You guys probably know my ideal balance. I talk about it a lot. The balance between productive and restful. When I can have a day where I get lots done but I also rest and enjoy things and let down a little, I feel the most human.

Today was one of those days.

I have to be careful what I post on here. After yesterdays post talking about house projects taking a little longer these days, Rae and Tom decided to offer to take the kids for a large chunk of today! What a HUGE gift! They took all eight of the kids from about mid morning until 3pm.

While they had them, we got to work! Brady did all the wiring in the island, for both the stovetop and a couple of outlets. I took all the drawers out so he could detach the cabinets from the kick box, as well as detach the countertop. He did lots of the fussy work, and I was the one who heaved the whole dang thing over a few inches.

While I wasn’t islanding, I worked on a wildly intricate blanket I’m making for this summer’s auction at Kinasao. Its probably my most challenging blanket to date, and its going to take absolutely forever 😅 Ive finished 11 rows! Only 249 left 😳

We spend the evening with the kids and my mom, as we often do on Sundays. We had macaroni and nuggets in celebration of our Lemon Drop 💜 Did you know we have a leap year baby?? We do! So happy belated birthday to that adorable little sweetheart. To know LD is to love LD.

Naturally, the new peanut has napped for the last four hours and is only waking up now, sooooo 😬🤞 wish us luck for the night!! Tomorrow brings the new week of school, appointments, visits, etc. I’m ready!

So Many Things, So Little Time

Brady had a few jobs to work on today. Definitely more him jobs that me jobs. Which actually kind of sucks. Bradys mobility has dropped off recently, which has been unsettling to say the least. I don’t normally share much about this kind of thing until we’ve gotten at least somewhat close to the bottom of it, or we have a plan. We are still working on both of those aspects of the situation, but it needs to come into conversation because, if you’re around it, you’ll notice. All is not lost. Just pray. We are hopeful, and God is sovreign.

So. Jobs. One job is still pertaining to our island. We had a setback last week, but the stove top WILL be installed this Tuesday. But before it can be, Brady needs to modify some cabinets, part of the countertop, and we have to shift the entire thing over a few inches. I know, it seems a bit dumb to move it all for such a small amount of space, but part of redoing the island was also to make a bit more room around it for Brady to function easier in the kitchen. So, more work now, but worth it in the long run.

Something that has been challenging recently for Brady is getting his wheelchair out of his van for work. He has a pretty good setup, but he still has to rely on strength in his legs to a degree, and right now, that is risky. Winter ice makes it all the more sketchy. So yesterday, I went to Princess Auto and I bought a hydraulic crane. This afternoon, Brady and Tom worked together to get it bolted into the minivan. This will provide a way safer way to get in and out of Bradys van. It is not a perfect system, but it definitely beats the total lack of system we have now!

With the change in mobility, jobs that rest on Brady are taking longer, obviously. I think we likely won’t make it to church tomorrow, because Tuesday will be here so soon and we have to get the island taken care of by then! If that was all we had to do, we could easily do it together and it would be over with. But our life is not that simple, perhaps you’ve noticed 😅 So we need to afford ourselves a bit more time for things right now.

It was a productive day 💜 A different level of productive than we’re used to over here, but not an instant burnout day, either. We’ll take it! Thank you, Lord, for carrying us through these uncertain waters. The ripples are getting higher, but You continue to point our chins up to the sky, keeping our heads above water and our eyes on You.

Back to Feeding

Our latest little peanut gurgles and rattles like a broken coffee maker. Not to the same level as the Morsel did, but, approaching. So we went in today. And it was oddly comfortable? I can’t quite explain it. But it was familiar, having been there with the Morsel and eventually graduating out from the feeding program after such great success. The feeding therapy team holds a very warm place in my heart.

So today, we found our way there and got into the appointment a few minutes early. In we went, and we went over the very minimal history I could offer on baby’s behalf. The therapist took the bottle and started the feeding, assessing every move made. We tried a different flow of nipple, and it made one detail better but another one worse. There was much burping, many breaks, and lots of brainstorming. We settled one some small tweaks, but with a swallow study to come. Hopefully next week already.

We left, and as we waited for the elevator, we were joined by a group of three. It seemed to me to be a husband and wife, as well as someone from the hospital transporting the husband in a wheelchair. He was in hospital jammies. They commented on the baby’s hair, of which there is a lot, and then the wife lovingly rubbed her husbands hair. He looked at me and told me he had phantom hair. I chuckled and asked him what that meant. Turns out he had a brain surgery, and now his nerves were all funny, and it feels like he’s wearing a toque at all times. I told him my husband had also had a brain surgery and he could relate to nerves doing funny things while they healed up, and that the numb spots are really strange. As we rode the elevator up to the main level, they mentioned brain surgery haircuts and how rough they are, and they laughed when I told them Brady was super concerned at the idea of having his beard shaved for surgery. When I said he was more concerned about his beard than his breathing, the man snort laughed. I got off on the main floor, and I heard them say they were heading up to the sixth. Thats neuro.

Oddly, the whole visit to the hospital felt kind of nice. Close to home, but not in a bad way. In a familiar way. Feeding stuff can be pretty tricky, but I feel like I know my way fairly well. And then to have a short interaction with people who have gone through brain surgery recently, and to be able to relate in some ways, it just felt like a reminder that God uses all our messy stuff for GOOD, if we let Him.

And we’re going to 💜

A Few Crochet Things

I had some ideas of things I wanted to do today, but the babies began alternating naps. This is a double edged sword, because I LOVE when they all nap at the same time, but also, when the newest little peanut naps, the others are a lot more self sufficient and can play and be busy without my needing to rock them constantly. And with that, if the older ones are napping and the little one is awake, its only one baby, which feels pretty easy. So there are good things about alternating naps as well.

Except nothing would work for more than fifteen minutes, lol! So after a couple times of getting set up for a larger plan, only to have it dashed the moment I got into it, I put the big stuff away and settled on small things. Very small things. As in, the first thing I “worked” on was watching a crochet video I saved a while back. I watched and rewatched it while I bounced the peanut, and from it, I learned! As soon as I could be hands-free, I grabbed some yarn that was laying around in the bookshelf (yup) and I practiced my new skill!

A little while later, I grabbed a blanket I have just barely begun working on that I know is going to be a long project, and as I re-familiarized myself with the pattern, I saw a section where the creator talked about a method she uses when she crochets this blanket, and I figured, what the heck. Why not? If it makes it better, all the more purpose it’ll serve! So I got into that and got a whopping 3/4 of a row done before I had to throw the towel in yet again, thanks to you know who.

However, while today was grossly unproductive in a tangible way, it was productive! I learned two new crochet skills that I definitely think I will use plenty when I’m able to make time to work on my projects! Hopefully they’ll bring my mosaic crochet up another level! 🙌

Kids and Glasses

Today was the long awaited eye appointment for the kids! They really like eye appointments because they like new glasses. Who doesn’t? I get it. The four kids got glasses two years ago, and last year three of them got new ones yet again. Not Rowan, because his contact is a lot more important than his glasses. So going in today, I had six kids with me, and we were all curious how many of them would come out with glasses, especially new glasses!

The Spoonful doesn’t need glasses. So that wasn’t as exciting as the kids had all hoped. Sorry, Spoons!

Wavy also doesn’t need glasses. She was so bummed, hahaha! She wanted glasses! But the feeling is that she will eventually need them. We all think she’ll go nearsighted in time. But, we’ll see. No glasses for now. Sorry, Wavy!

Solly’s prescription stayed mostly the same. No new glasses for him! Sorry, Sol!

Rowan’s prescription improved, which is AMAZING, as his vision is the wildest of them all. However, his contact is what is changing, not his glasses. So the poor guy, yet again, doesn’t get new glasses. His are still in perfect condition because he virtually never wears them. Sorry, Ro!

Laela’s prescription also barely changed! One detail that changed is that her eyes really struggle to meet in the middle. When the eye doctor moves her pen around and you’re supposed to follow it with your eyes, and then she moves it in and boops your nose with it, that was where Laela almost couldn’t get it to work. Her brain would switch one eye off so she would just use one. So that was noteworthy, but nothing can be done about it at the moment. If it starts to present a problem, there are cool new vision therapies that can be done. But we’re not there yet. No new glasses for her, either! Sorry, Laela!

Dekker had the same detail as Laela, where his eyes don’t want to meet in the middle. However, his prescription did change. For the better!!! His eyes have improved, which is likely thanks to aging and growing and approaching puberty and all that good stuff. But he was the lucky one. HE got to pick new glasses. He branched out a little in his Dekker way, still coming out with black plastic frames, but older, more mature looking ones, with a new shape. They’re cool, I won’t lie. But a big yay for Dekker! NOT sorry to him!!

I will admit to being a little bummed that more kids didn’t need new glasses. There were so many fun kids glasses in stock this time around. But there will be more when the time comes, and that will likely be in a year or so.

All things considered, it was a successful afternoon of appointments. I’m happy some eyes showed improvement, and I’m happy no one was in any kind of desperate spot, vision wise. I’m very grateful for our health.

Thank you, mom, for keeping the other two babes so I didn’t have absolutely everyone along 😅 Six felt like enough. Only one of them cried. It sure would’ve been more than that if we had the whole group! I appreciate you 💜

Ok. Clubs are done. Kids will be home any minute. To bed they go! And then to bed I get to go, also!! After falling asleep in the recliner this afternoon, I am ready to tuck in for the night!

Not Quite There

Today held an awesome plan. Rae offered to take the babies for the day, which was a HUGE gift to me! Not only is a total treat to have a day to do things that are a lot harder to do with the babies, but it was also stove top day!

Except it wasn’t 😩

So here’s the thing. Our new stove is a behemoth. And our plumber is hesitant to put it in as is without really making 1000% sure its done to code and in a safe way. So this morning, instead of a couple if plumbers coming to install our stove, she came with a gas inspector. The manual they could find online was specific to the bran but less to the exact model, so we ended up unwrapping the whole thing in an effort to find the exact manual that was actually ON the appliance. Back inside we went, and Brady, Leah (our plumber) and the gas inspector, Kurt, combed through the pages, line by line. It was a long, drawn out process, but all four of us are determined to make this work. We want it to be safe, but we also want it to work. We know its going to cost more than we had hoped, but if this is the only real renovation we do this year, then so be it. I am still completely thrilled about our new island and stove top. Just have to get it all done!

Once Leah and Kurt cleared out, Brady also went back to work, and that was my morning gone! 😅 Goodness time goes by fast!! I had big work goal, but with that long meeting, paired with some unexpected drama waaay too early in the morning as well, I was BEAT. So, rather than working on things that are slightly higher on the priority list, I crocheted. It was so peaceful and lovely.

And then of course I got everyone out the door, picked up the babies from Rae (Thank you SO MUCH for such a lovely day off!) and headed into the city for a visit! We managed to get everyone fed, Brady to the chiropractor, and even managed to get Dekker a spring jacket and Wavy winter boots at Value Village before the evening was over.

What a huge day. I am pooped. But! Our latest addition SLEPT THROUGH THE NIGHT last night!!! If we could have a repeat of that…

A Speedy VV Shop

I popped into Value Village today for a quick few minutes. I had kids waiting in the van but I had a couple of goals in mind and more minutes to spare than expected. I had a surprisingly successful shop in a very short period of time, coming out with a few books that Dekker and Laela have been asking for, and even Rowan is starting to get into. I got what I HOPE it going to be able to be my new butter dish (size pending) and I got a puzzle, since I actually have some time and capability to do them now! Second hand puzzles are always a gamble, but come on. This person cared a LOT about their puzzle. Bagged the edge pieces and everything.

I’m hopeful it’ll have all the pieces! 🤞

In amongst the shelves of kids chapter books, I happened upon a copy of one of my favorite books from growing up! I may have had my own copy back in the day, I can’t be sure one way or the other, but I have a memory of the one I read in childhood absolutely falling apart at the seam. And this copy it beautifully brand new!! For only $1.79, I had to snap it up!

Like my new specs? 🥸 Thanksmetoo!

After my short successful shop, I left to go complete my city trip, and was very shortly thereafter informed that Wavys winter boots have giant holes in the bottom. So. Back shopping I will go!

Tomorrow. Because whats one more day of wet feet? She can wear double socks in rubber boots for a day, lol!

Rowan Turns Ten

🙌

Today is the day where Rowan has been with us for a decade! Ten full trips around the sun!

It has been the coolest year with Rowan. Like. I want to say his BEST. We have made some small changes to his medication, and guys, if you have a child who you relate to Rowan, get in touch with me, because we have found a game changer! For us, at least. For Rowan 💜 This boy can finally let down and LIVE!

And with that, we all can really get to know him. And guys, he is just SO easy to love. We’ve always known it, but we also know the pin can get pulled at a moments notice, and its scary to be in the splash zone. But now, there is no pin. There is no explosion. There are still ALL the emotions a person should have, but impulses are controlled so beautifully. The brain can process. And he can MANAGE his emotions. An example. This weekend, his parkour gym was having a speed competition, and Rowan really wanted us to register him. So we did! And fairly last minute, we were informed it was cancelled due to lack of entries. I dreaded telling him, but when I did, he dropped his head and was clearly disappointed, and then I heard him take in a deep breath and say “Well, those things happen. It’ll be ok. I have some skills I need to practice more anyway.” And that was that!!!

If times get tough, he will take his break, and come out and make his genuine apologies on his own. I can say with confidence that Rowan is thriving!! FINALLY!!!

Things Rowan loves!! Lego. Meccano. Building. Singing! Movie nights. Helping with jobs, and feeling responsible. Rowan is doing sound for the musical this fall. He does parkour once a week. He likes to help in the kitchen. He can keep a secret. Any wound can be healed with a joke.

If I could pinpoint it, I say Rowan loves to show love with acts of service, and he receives love through quality time.

Rowan is a total rockstar. He is SO dear to me, and I am incredibly grateful to know him, be close to him, and call him my child 💜 My middlest. My snuggliest. My determined, strong, motivated, passionate, hard working, self aware TEN year old boy!!!!

I love you, precious Rowan Toby. It has been an incredible year! I am really looking forward to whats to come for you 💜

Productive Without a Stove

We got more done today than I anticipated! It started with Laela going to a morning rehearsal for the school musical. Have I mentioned that on here yet?? Man its hard to keep straight what I have and haven’t shared! Anyway. She went there. I sent snacks for the cast since I forgot to follow up with parent volunteers to bring snacks. Whoops. But then we moved forward into the day! I put in two grocery orders, and we got further into the island renovation. I can’t wait to show you guys the change! Ack!!

As the morning progressed, our Costco order arrived, and it was a good sized one. Three boxes of diapers, plus a big thing of toilet paper, four packs of chicken breasts (a good sale!) and just a huge mess of fresh stuff. There wasn’t too much junk in there at all. Oh, except for the big bog of Lindor chocolates 😬 Definitely could’ve done worse though! Lol! It takes me a long time to finish up a Costco order. I cut apart things that come in multiples. Open up packages and unload things in a way that provides ease. Plus a couple veggie items I insist on splitting into lunch sized portions for everyone to take to school and work.

Once everything was put away, Brady was already on his way to Saskatoon to get bloodwork done. Chemo starts again next week, and the meds are not released to him without good happy bloodwork. So he did that and I tried to rest and put my feet up, but only got about 15 minutes of that before the babies rioted. And then Walmart showed up with more groceries 😅 So the rest wasn’t long, but it was something. I got those groceries put away without much fuss at all. It was a much smaller order than Costco.

Brady came home around the same time that Walmart did. We sipped some coffee together for a short time and then got back into the island work. I made the kids go play outside, lol! Dekker wanted to come in way sooner than I thought he should, so I told him he could home in if he was willing to work. And he said yes. So he did lots of entertaining the babies, and some help with the island as well.

Supper time crept up, and I was reminded that I don’t have a stove for a few days. So I pulled out my instant pot. That thing scares the heck out of me. It feels like a whole new thing to learn, so I’ve used it only a few times and rather, I choose to let it hold my kitchen dust, since I really want to preserve that. But today, I tried to be brave and I found a recipe for one pot spaghetti and meatballs, mostly because I found a bag of frozen meatballs in my freezer today when I was unpacking my ten ish bags of frozen broccoli. (I typed “broccoli” as “probably.” I am tired.) I had to relearn how to use the thing, but I have to hang it to that clunky old appliance – it made a great creamy spaghetti meal.

A spaghetti that I ate from the living room, trying to convince the newest family member to drink milk and stop crying. The life of having babies! I wouldn’t trade it!

Everyone is now in bed, and I am ready to lay in bed, and get pictures organized for a birthday blog tomorrow!! 🥳 Better late than never, right??

A Full Heart, Unexpectedly

I am feeling so richly blessed today. I was able to reconnect with our dear Morsel this afternoon 💜 I cannot explain all of the feelings that were floating around in the air. I had the expectation of dropping something off to the Morsels mom, rubbing the baby’s back, saying I loved them, and walking away. Instead, I was welcomed into their appointment with them. We bantered and she updated me on all kinds of goings on, milestones, and anecdotes. It felt warm and peaceful. The Morsel seemed confused, for sure, but not unhappy. Quizzical.

When the appointment was done, as we walked out, she offered for me to carry our Morsel. I thanked her and asked baby if that was ok. The moment the Morsel was in my arms, they reached their hands up and tenderly touched my face, a little smirk on their face. I barely could keep myself from completely giving in to tears. We walked to the front desk and while she spoke to reception, I asked and was granted the chance to take some pictures 💜 So we did that, and then watched the fish in the tank. It felt SO good to lay my eyes on the Morsel. And my hands! The unexpected softness from both mom and baby was incredibly thrilling for my heart.

As my overthinking mind wanders, all I can do is pray that I did it all as right as I could – that I didn’t overstep, or overwhelm, or that the Morsel didn’t struggle after we parted ways. I pray that she didn’t feel uncomfortable with our warm reunion, and that she remains open to knowing me and my family. BUT. I want what is best for the Morsel, however that looks. If this is the final visit, I couldn’t be more grateful 💜

Thank you Lord for this chance, and for working in the Morsels family 💜 I know you are there with them also. We praise Your name, no matter Your will.