The Daily Hailey

I’ve gotten this question a handful of times, so I figured I’d talk about it! Is Rowan potty trained? Very recently, the short answer was “no.” But you know I’m going to give you the long answer 😉

Our current short answer to that question is “pretty much, yup.” Yes, he’s four, and that seems late. But we had reasons!

One big reason was his personality. While fabulous, Rowan has a really floaty personality. I’ve often said he’d never take off in a public place, but if the wind blew, he’d be gone. He just kind of goes along with whatever. With that general carefree nature, he was pretty neutral on the subject of bathroom stuff. He seemed completely unaware of when he would go, and it didn’t bother him to have a wet/dirty diaper. Waiting for him to be “ready” took forever. 

Another factor, which I won’t go too in-depth with is that Rowan pretty much always had diarrhea. We’ve since figured out his lactose intolerance and turned that whole thing around. We couldn’t imagine trying to potty train a kid who was in a perpetual state of the poops. 

The last factor around why we waited with the potty training is just that life picked up, and we weren’t in a rush. We knew he’d use the toilet eventually, and frankly, this was not the first time we’d had three kids in diapers. Changing his diaper didn’t put us off. It was just life. So we weren’t feeling the big need to push him to train, and he couldn’t have cared less about it.

Around Christmas time, kind of out of nowhere, Rowan decided he wanted to wear underwear. Which was AWESOME. Its always SO much better when the kid initiates it! He successfully used the toilet a handful of times, but our quiet, low key Christmas picked up and literally every single day of the holiday was loaded with plans and play and company. It just was not the time to potty train, so we put him in pull-ups, and he used them as expensive diapers over the holiday. Sadly, after the holidays, Ro was over it, and didn’t care to try and potty train. Booooo.

You’re probably aware, but Rowan turned four towards the end of February. We talked a lot about how he was officially big now, and it was time for underwear and toilets and all that stuff. And he was into it! He rocked pull-ups for a bit, but it was just too easy for him to pee in them. He peed in the toilet often, and was totally capable, but when he didn’t feel like it, he wouldn’t. Our incentives didn’t affect him much, either. So we bit the bullet and finally put him in underwear, anticipating at least a few days of peeing on the floor. Lo and behold, he did SO well!!! He definitely knew what to do, and he didn’t pee on the floor once! However, as many kids do, he saved most of his business for nap time and bedtime, when we’d put him back in a pull-up. So last week, for naps, we left him in underwear. Ad let me tell you, he SOAKED that bed a couple of times! WOW! Thank the Lord for mattress protectors!! Hahaha! Lucky for us, he was super put off by the wetness of his accident. He was finally affected by his messes! It seemed to open his eyes.

The last several days have been accident-free! He’s still usually wet in the morning, but that will be along shortly, I’m sure. I had to share all of this today just so I can tell you what happened last night. I’m still torn about whether to be horrified, or giddy, or so so proud. Maybe you can help me out. 

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Yesterday evening, Brady went down to the kitchen for something (Any other late night snackers out there?) and found Dekker, Laela, and Rowan ALL in the bathroom!! Just hanging out! He obviously sent everyone back to bed, as no one was actually using the bathroom. Just having a party. (Ain’t no potty like an S Club potty!) The kids all went back to bed, but I learned this morning, this was not their last potty party of the night.

Upon getting Laela up for school this morning, she told me she helped Rowan in the bathroom overnight. I figured she meant that evening party, where clearly at least one of them had gone into the bathroom with intention to use it, and maybe she had been there with Rowan while he peed or something. But apparently that wasn’t what she meant at all. 

Apparently, she had gotten up to pee, and while she was in there, Dekker and Rowan had both knocked to come in. She finished up and let them in. Dekker peed and left, and Rowan took his turn. Apparently he peed, and then pooped! AND LAELA WIPED HIM UP!!! I’m sure I looked like a total fool as she told me this story, but I was TOTALLY floored.
“Its really ok, mom.” Laela explained. “If I hadn’t helped him, he wouldn’t know if he was clean or not. He doesn’t know how yet. I just helped him like you used to help me.”

Totally. Floored. 

Is that awful? 

Or adorable?

Or mature?

Or gross?

Or amazing? 

I can’t decide for sure, but I’m inclined to just be so proud of my daughter, who knew what I would do, and took it upon herself to do just that, even though its a bit of a dirty job. 

I’m also SO proud of Rowan for pooping on his own, in the middle of the night, when he could’ve very easily used his pull-up. He didn’t want to! He wanted to use the toilet!! I’m SO impressed with his newfound self awareness! 

I post these things for my memories, and to maybe encourage others who don’t do everything the most conventional, common way. Its vulnerable, and I hope I can count on you guys not to judge us. I probably say “To each their own” multiple times a day, every single day. I respect you, so please respect us 🙂 I am SO proud of the direction we’re moving in with Rowan, and his maturity level!

Soon, I assume I’ll confidently be saying we’re down to only two in diapers!! Even now, Ro is only in a pull-up overnight, and if they’re going to keep having potty parties, I could see the pull-up not being necessary for too much longer! I’m so so proud of them all!