I’m going to lead off with saying I have SO much respect for people who work in the medical world! Its a HARD job, and nothing can ever be perfect. NO BURN on ANYONE!!! But guys, I was SO PISSED on Friday! Hahaha! Oy! Still shaking a little.
So I don’t think I’ve shared a lot on here about it, because its been so minor, but I’ve been having some shoulder pain. It started where I felt like I had a shot, but I hadn’t. Just a dull soreness. Nothing crazy at all. It persisted for more than a few days, and I figured I had probably strained a muscle in there somehow. I had strained an abdominal muscle delivering Solomon and that caused me grief for a solid two months, so I figured I had about a two month wait on this shoulder thing. But it was no big deal.
And then it started changing. It would swell and turn red. It would hurt more or less on different days, but for no particular reason, it seemed. And in no time, the two months were behind me and my shoulder was only getting worse. My sore shoulder was consistently warmer than the other. Always inflamed. Putting my hair in a ponytail hurt. Changing my shirt hurt. Picking a mug off the shelf hurt. Anytime I had to reach at all I was in pain. Last Monday was the kicker. I woke up to my shoulder just smouldering. The whole squishy part of my shoulder (not sure what to call it! Not my back, but like, the top of my arm. That shoulder part) was hot to the touch, and it hurt just to touch!! I zapped awake when I rolled onto that side.
So that was that. I called for an appointment with my doctor. I needed some outside help. I assumed I’d end up at physio, but in case there was worry about something growing in there or fluid or something I hadn’t thought of yet, I wanted to talk to Dr. Guselle about it. Lo and behold, she was booked pretty solid. Into December. That wouldn’t do. I asked to see a first year resident, which would guarantee I’d actually see Dr. Guselle herself even if just at the end of the appointment. Nope, that was into December, too. I was pretty bummed, and said maybe I’d just go to a walk-in, then. She pushed and pushed, and I finally agreed to see a second year resident. So I wouldn’t see Dr. Guselle in the appointment, but she would review everything herself. I figured, why not. Either I see a second year resident or a doctor unrelated to her office completely. So, fine, I agreed to see a second year at the end of the week.
And wouldn’t you know it. They did not book me with a second year resident at all. They gave me an appointment with a nurse practitioner.
Now. I have a lot of nurse friends who I love and respect. But I had spoken to a nurse on the subject already. No burn, but I was ready to move up the line and see a doctor. Not a second nurse. I was mad. But I kept my cool and said to the receptionist who checked me in “I was given a doctors name when I made the phone call. I was not originally booked with a nurse.” And she bugged her eyes out at me and said “Well, it’ll be fine! Take a seat!” I felt SO disrespected, and pretty frustrated at the situation at hand.
I’m a pretty polite person, so I in no way let on that I was upset. I went into my appointment, where the nurse assured me she was “basically a doctor,” and asked me what I needed. I gave her the rundown of my pain and how it had changed and progressed for such a long time. I told her all the details – how it hurts when I raise it past a certain point. How its hot to the touch. How it swells up so much. But she didn’t touch it to feel for heat, or have me even raise it to see how far it could go. She had me stand up, and she poked around my neck a little. She then sat down in front of me and informed me that I was probably born with curvature of the spine. I was completely caught off guard. Yup, she insisted, that was it. And after ALL my life, it was finally pinching something in my shoulder. I wasn’t sold, but I was polite. I pointed out how I’ve had a baby on my hip for about eight years now, so maybe my posture was out, and affecting my muscles. Nope. She dismissed that on the spot. It was obviously from birth. That was it. That was the answer. She advised me to figure it out from there. I said “Physio?” And she seemed fine with that.
I. Was. So. Mad. What a HUGE waste of my time!!! I walked out of there fuming. I learned nothing. Gained nothing. She didn’t even consider what I was saying. Not even a little. And I’m sorry. Again. I LOVE my nurse friends, and I LOVE the nursing profession. But I had been there, done that. Shouldn’t it be disclosed to the patient in advance that they’re seeing a nurse rather than a doctor? If you’ve ever called the nurses hotline, they will say right on the spot, they’re registered nurses, not doctors, so they can’t diagnose. Its simple. I should’ve had to consent in advance.
What this woman did succeed at was making my pain so much worse. She had briefly checked my shoulder, jabbing her fingertips into places, asking if it hurt. I said it didn’t, it only really hurt when I lifted my arm. So she dug deeper until I jumped and told her she was hurting me. So now, not only do I still have the pain I get from lifting my arm, but I have a constant burn now where she dug SO deep and really really hurt me. This patchy red spot has only appeared since that appointment, and seems to be staying put. Its also swollen constantly, rather than going up and down. It hurts always.
Unfortunately, there was clearly no resolution that day, and this post is somewhat open ended. I will be contacting my physiotherapist in the very near future in hopes that she can help me repair whatever muscle is angry or whatever is out of line. I thought things would be long healed by two months, and they’ve only worsened. I can push through pain and stretch and exercise, but I don’t want to mess anything up. I need to know what’s happening in there, and I know, in this case, my physio will provide WAY more information than I received on Friday’s appointment.