In exactly ONE MONTH, we are hosting a celebration for Bambina coming into the world, safe and sound!! This party has been in my mind since I was pregnant with Jamin, though I never voiced the idea, and then was humiliated that I had even thought it could work out. I know, there was no need to be embarrassed, but still, I was obviously choked about the aspect of losing something else.

When we found out we had once again conceived a baby, I didn’t wait too long before I pushed myself to start planning a party. I wanted to celebrate every single day I was pregnant, and I knew that planning a party wouldn’t play ANY role in whether she lived or died. Jinxes be damned.

So I planned, and she’s continued to grow and thrive!

I admit that I sometimes go to darker places, and wonder what in the world we’ll do if she passes away. We have everything in place. We know what we’ll need to buy fresh, and already have on hand most things that we can have in advance. We’ve spent time perfecting the right ratio of cold brewed coffee. We’ve recruited help for some of the baking. We’ve ordered invitations. We’ve purchased decor, some small kitchen things, drink dispensers, etc. I’ve chosen clothes. We’ve PLANNED. We are READY. What, oh WHAT in the world will we do if she isn’t here for her party?? I promise, I don’t go here too terribly often, because I know just how out of my hands the answer to this question really is. I have NO control. But I’m not going to lie and say I never go there, because I do. So I’m scared. At least a little bit scared.

I will know this answer in one month. Less, even. I am hopeful that all will be well and we’ll have a super special morning, celebrating our littlest babe, among friends, family, and everyone who has anticipated her arrival along with us! My Facebook event is still open and ready for more people, so PLEASE, if I’ve missed you and you’d like to come, be in touch! Our entire church will be invited with actual invites once she’s born, but not until then, because they have her beautiful name on them 🙂 But the door is still WIDE open for anyone else who wants to come! I’m starting to need numbers so I can actually arrange how many of which things we need! Please, friends, be in touch 💜 I’m SO looking forward to this!

The party is roughly two weeks after she’d due to be born, and that day is in about 2.5 weeks. My goodness, time is moving fast!

Trust me, I KNOW I’m super pregnant. This baby is NOT a subtle baby. I KNOW I’m in my third trimester, coming up on baby day. But my gosh, over this last week or so, I feel like we’re back to square one. This morning, it was more apparent than usual.

I feel nauseous. SO nauseous. Which makes NO sense. I’m not sick. I have no reason to be sick. But WOW do my guts ever hurt!! On top of that, I’m crampy and sore. I know. I sound like I have a tummy bug, but this is just how things have been feeling in the recent days! So. So. Weird.

I should clarify here. I’m not in unbelievable pain or anything. This morning felt pretty bananas, but as I moved around, went about my normal morning stuff, and threw back a glass or two of water, there was definite relief. There is just a constant icky nausea that lingers and refuses to quit.

Have any of you ended up back on Diclectin in your last stretch of pregnancy? Is that a thing that happens? The few food aversions I had in my first trimester are back and everything. What gives??

On a positive note, it was a handy day to have a helpful friend over in the morning to do my dishes, wash ALL of Bambina’s bottles (thats a BIG thing off my list!), and then entertain my kids so I could sit and rest, intentionally drink lots of water, and creep the internet for what third trimester nausea means.

Isn’t it fun how helpful people in your life make you strong enough to be a helpful person yourself? I’m so thankful for my days and who I’m fortunate enough to share them with 💖

When Solly turned two, I mentioned on his birthday post that he wasn’t much of a talker. That was my VERY gentle way of saying that my kid said nothing. Like NOTHING at all. He made sounds, for sure, but they weren’t intentional or said at times that made any sense. Or wait, I should take that back. He had one long line of sounds that we always took as “Where’s _______?” Wheresdaaaa? Whereslaaaa? Stuff like that. But not even “hi” or “bye.” Nada.

We are so fortunate to have a dear friend nearby who happens to be an occupational therapist, and she lovingly suggested we try some baby sign language. Her advice wasn’t even based on his lack of speech, but on the fact that we were struggling hard in our family, and Solly was screaming SO MUCH, and I just needed some of it to stop!! She suggested that Solly’s ability to communicate even just a bit more might reduce the screaming. I’ve seen lots of baby sign, but have never exercised it in my home. She gave some basic signs to try and told me how to begin the teaching process. I don’t know how long it usually takes for a kid to learn sign, but I figured with Solly being two already, it would be a pretty quick sell.

He took to it differently than I had expected. We worked with him, and helped him sign “more” and “all done” any and every time it was relevant. And he HATED it!! He would fight SO hard, ad refused to do the sign himself. At one point, he was positively wailing for crackers, and I was waiting patiently for him to sign, because he knew that was what was expected of him, and instead, he just bellowed “CRACKERRRRR!” So yes, obviously, the kid got a cracker, because TALKING! That seemed to start something.

He finally started signing on his own for things, but almost immediately, it turned to him doing the “more” sign while saying “mo!” He also started talking, kind of out of nowhere! When he signs “done,” he says “done!” Its SO awesome! In the last two weeks, he went from basically no language to saying all kinds of things! Mommy, Daddy, Grandma, ya, no, please, thank you, more, done, help, banana, pants (lol!) and lots of other things! Ya and no have been total game changers, honestly. They help SO much, because as a two year old, he has opinions about things, and he’s old enough to make some choices, and now that he finally says a few things, he can finally communicate what he wants. Frustration – POOF! – gone!

Another big change in his speaking is that he’ll try new words all the time! Its like its finally clicked. He’ll mimic what we say, what the kids say, etc., and then gets excited when we all get excited for him! He’s so easily brighten up and encourage.

I feel like, at the very LEAST, the little bit of sign that we taught him brought him a huge amount of confidence! It was like, once he had felt the relief of being able to communicate even just a little, he KNEW he could do more! He is relieved, and so are we! So. Are. We.

Don’t get me wrong. I loved this kid before he talked. But our relationship has shifted beautifully since he could speak to me, and I could better meet his needs. SO much nicer for both of us!

** He just handed me a toy truck and told me “tuck.” His language is about to whip into gear, just you wait!!

Guys. We have three more weeks. Three. More. Weeks. I’m not really sure what to say about that. Its SO SOON. Everything is wrapping up, timelines are being met, things are getting done, and I am really realizing just how real things are about to get! I have quite a few thoughts on the subject from the week.

Size Comparison: My favourite comparison from this week is that baby is the size of a cabbage patch doll. I could see that being true. Not weight wise, but general mass wise, perhaps. This little miss is ALL up in my ribs, ALL down in my business, and there is often an obvious elbow or knee jabbing out the sides. Its getting FULL in there, and I think she and I are both feeling it. I think we’re pretty anxious to meet each other on the outside.

Appointments: Remember, in my last blog, I talked about that special butt swab I was forewarned about this coming week? Lol! I hesitated to write about it at all, and then pretty much all of the comments I received on that post were based on that topic, haha! I am VERY happy and relieved to report that my student doctor offered for me to perform my own GBS swab, which I immediately agreed to. We had a bit of a laugh together and he commented that he’d vastly prefer to do his own also, if one was necessary. I think we all would. So thats taken care of! Hopefully results are good 🙂 The other significant topic of conversation that came up in my appointment was that bizarre night of labourish feelings from two nights before. He was definitely interested in all the details, but there is really no way to truly know what happened or why. I decided against a cervical check, and basically we were both just happy that the pain and  contractions have stopped for the time being. I’m happy with this conclusion for a handful of reasons, but the biggest reason being that Dr. Guselle was not around for our appointment, and I trust her opinions and judgement calls more than that of my student doctor, as well as the doctor who was overseeing our appointment and who did not make an appearance in our appointment, even though he was technically required to. Not my fave. I’m anticipating seeing Dr. Guselle on Friday again. We’re officially in the weeklies!

How am I feeling emotionally: I’m not going to lie. I am emotionally spent. I’m tired in ALL the ways, but I am so very weary, and just tired of worrying. I just want her home finally. This has been the longest stretch of uncertainty I have ever experienced in my life, and while I have worked hard to cast my cares at God’s feet, and He HAS rescued me time and time again, I am completely exhausted from it all. I want to be able to take in some deep breaths as I hold her fresh little body while she cries through those first few breaths of air. For her to be in my arms, ALIVE, and in need of her mommy and daddy to just drench her with love and care. To listen to her snorty sleep sounds, and feed her, clean her, and kiss her delicious-smelling head over and over and over again. I. Cannot. Wait. I’m tired of the “what ifs” and the “hopefullys.” Who knew waiting was such a fatiguing thing?? 

How am I feeling physically: We’re at a funny place physically, where I think, despite my best efforts, I’m just going to be sore. There has been a significant shift in the last week or so, and even though I’m still following all of my very strict chiro/physio rules, I am positively aching. My pelvis is looser than ever, and makes audible crunchy sounds when I so much as shift in my bed. Rolling over is next to impossible. Just now, I looked up from my laptop and saw Solly had his arm, up to his elbow, down his pants. I laughed at him, and my pelvis and lower back crunched. So, thats fun.

Wish Lish/Purchases: It was an exciting mail week!!! My baby party dress AND my period panties arrived on the same day!!!! I was SO amped! Unfortunately, the dress didn’t fit 🙁 Weirdly, it didn’t fit in the top. It gaped in the shoulders and pits pretty badly, and holding kids and such will only stretch the neckline. Since maaad cleavage isn’t so much what I’m going for, I had to return it :/ Now I decide whether or not to pay for shipping again, considering its an online exclusive and I can’t buy it in store. Hmmm… The period underwear, however, are a WIN! I obviously haven’t tested them out in full capacity, but they fit, and they’re WAY more comfortable than the slightly cheaper (though still expensive) brand I tried recently. Win!! I discovered I can remove one thing off my “to buy” list, which is disappointing, but saves me a few bucks, anyway. I got some cute little tongs for the fruit trays that we’ll have at the baby party, which have been weirdly hard to find. Lastly, for anyone who wants to help in a big/small way, I found the soothers I want on amazon, and they appear to be virtually impossible to find in store. They are only a $5 add-on for an Amazon Prime member, which I am, but I literally have NOTHING to buy from Amazon right now! Anyone local friends ordering from Amazon anytime soon? If you’re willing to add $5 on for Bambina, please let me know!

Pictures: Bumpity bump! 

I. Am. Huge.
She. Is. Growing!

How are the kids feeling: This week, at Dekker’s track and field day, someone approached Laela and asked her what was in my belly. Laela, who tends to be a bit standoffish around new people, dove right into the conversation about the baby. She told her right away that it was a baby girl. When asked if the baby being a girl made her a more exciting baby, Laela answered with an excited “YUP!” immediately! Hahaha! Sooooo I think thats a positive! Lots of people have been saying to me recently that Laela needs a sister, and really, she doesn’t. Don’t get me wrong, we are AMPED that Bambina is a little lady! I couldn’t be more thrilled, seriously!! But as I’ve said since the beginning of Laela’s life, if she is the one little girl I ever get, whether we stopped having children or continued on to have ten more boys, I was completely thrilled to have her! She is a LOT of little girl, and I love her to death. In the earlier stages of my pregnancy, she was the one kid who was guessing that the baby was a boy. She wasn’t itching or twitching for a girl at all! But now that Bambina is coming, she is THRILLED! As we all are.

Getting to know the baby: Ok, todays guess about Bambina is that she’s going to be more so from Brady’s side of the family. I THINK she will take after Solly and/or Dekker. Just based on how I’m feeing in this last month, its quite reminiscent of how I felt with those kids in particular. I could ALWAYS be wrong, obviously, but thats my guess. We’ll know soon!!

The BEST part of being pregnant: The best part of being pregnant these days is finding a song with her nickname secretly tucked in it, and listening to it over and over again, just to hear her name said out loud, or to even sing it myself! Saying it out loud feels SO taboo, but singing it when no one around knows her name feels sliiiiightly safer. Eek!

Favourite thing: I’m going to go out on a vague limb and say my favourite thing right now is second hand maternity clothing! I’ve been beautifully showered with hand me downs this pregnancy, for myself and for Bambina, and its been really fun to build wardrobes for us that I genuinely like! Truly, I’ve appreciated and enjoyed it! Recently, a friend added me to a buy and sell page on Facebook specifically for maternity wear. Where have I been that I didn’t know about this page?? Since I was added, I’ve scored two AWESOME items for $5 each! Firstly, I got an obnoxiously bright and beautiful coral hoodie, which I was really in the market for, as my ONE maternity hoodie is from when I was pregnant with Dekker. No lie. SO worn out! The other item I scored is a beautifully stretchy, comfy, black and white striped pencil skirt. It will definitely work postpartum as well, which is a huge selling feature! I actually tried to buy this skirt from Thyme a while back when it was new. I placed the order, and before they sent it my way, it sold out, and I couldn’t actually get it in the end. Someone bought it in my size, wore it once or twice, and sold it to me for $5! It is even comfier than I anticipated! I am THRILLED!!

I hardly know what to say, guys. Three more weeks is SO few! I’m seeing my lists get shorter and shorter as more and more stuff gets done! As tends to happen, things also get added, but its not as overwhelming anymore. The biggest, more important things, are done. If we were to have our baby girl today, she would very likely be fine, and the rest of the stuff on the lists would either get done or it wouldn’t, and it would be fine. I’m a firm believer in adding stuff to my list that I’ve already done, just so I can cross them off and feel good about myself and what I’ve accomplished. Today, I took the opposite approach and I removed everything off my list that I had originally just stoked off. While its now a full list with nothing crossed off, it is WAY smaller and feels doable and exciting! The biggest stuff is definitely gone and done!!

Except the hospital bag… I should probably pack that sucker before the kids comes…

Today was definitely a mixed bag of feelings!! Yet I can boil it down and see it was a wonderful day, which is always a positive thing, and something I’m very grateful for.

Brady and I woke up a bit early, and decided to enjoy breakfast and coffee in bed before getting the kids up. This is always a good kick off 🙂 The kids ate breakfast on time, and got into the clothes I had pulled for them. There were a few attitudes, and it seemed like church might be a bit rocky, but thats not all too unfamiliar, and we rolled with it.

Turns out we were RIGHT, and the little boys were completely bananas all through church. I thought childrens church was over for summer, and was taken by surprise when the kids ages 4-7 were dismissed to the basement for their own church! Half the kids were left to juggle, but they were the trickier ones 😉 We worked at it and finally gave up and Brady took them home. The church was SO hot today, and the little boys were already fighty and frustrated, so Brady took them home and got them dressed into tshirts, while grabbing some for the rest of us as well. I stayed at church so the big kids could finish out childrens church. It was so nice and quiet for that last chunk of church. I was also really happy to sit with a friend who I don’t see too terribly often! Community is SUCH a huge part of making it to church for me <3

I texted Brady during the final song so he’d come back to church for us, and gathered Dekker and Laela to meet him outside. By then, the wind had picked up and we enjoyed the breeze on the sidewalk while we waited for our bus. It came, and off we went to my parents.

The first order of business was getting Dekker fed and back out the door to a birthday party for 1:00. He was SO amped! By the time I got him dropped off and I made it back home, the little boys were down for their naps. The house was so nice and quiet, and we spent a lot of time discussing plans we all had for the rest of the year. They talked bathroom renos in all the specifics, and asked Brady for some advice and directions to move in. I made a few small decisions about the baby party coming up and crossed a few things off of my ever-dwindling list, which felt wonderful. It was all casual and low pressure, but it felt solidly productive! Every single time something gets crossed off that list, I feel better and better!

A couple of hours after dropping Dekker off, I went back for him, and was greeted by one sweaty beast of a boy, beaming with joy from having such a good time with his friends!

I brought him home, and shortly thereafter, the little boys got up. Chaos ensued, as one would expect, and energy levels were high and loud! They all played hard, and then enjoyed a delicious supper of cinnamon buns and fruit salad. Yum yum yum!!! I ate my body weight in those cinnamon rolls. It was a great end to the day!

Now, kids are tucked away and my bathtub is calling my name. I can’t deny that thing.

Tomorrow will be a quieter home day, I believe. Nothing too crazy on the books 🙂 Maybe I’ll even cross a few more things off my list! Wish me luck!! Hopefully I remember to set my alarm this time….

Its an odd day, because I have a lot of things I’m excited to share with you guys, but just about all of it needs to wait. They need to wait until the next series post, or just next week in general, or just down the line. Some of the things feel a bit repetitive, but I’m amped about them, so I’d like to share them again. But maybe thats weird? I don’t know. My brain is buzzing but there isn’t much to share just yet!

Something I can tell you is that we got Brady his Father’s Day gift today! Its a week and a day early, but thats perfectly acceptable, according to him! We FINALLY got this man a barbecue!!! Rather than him having a surprise gift, I told him a while ago that I wanted him to get a barbecue for Father’s Day so he could begin his search for exactly what he wanted. Being that our life is as busy as it is, he hasn’t poured too terribly much work into researching, and we decided just yesterday to spend this morning going to a handful of different stores, weighing our options, and finding a good, simple, biggish grill for our family. We did a tiny bit of digging online to see what was out there, read some reviews, and picked a route of where to go and in what order.

The kids were amped to go out and run errands, so besides one ridiculous meltdown from Laela based around her apparent need to wear Solly’s shorts and not her own, we had a pretty smooth morning.

Brady and I both are bad for buying the first thing we see that we like, so we made a point to NOT do that, and to hit a good handful of stores. Once we had seen what was out there, we lunched and chatted and finally laughed at ourselves as we headed back to the first store and purchased the first barbecue that we had liked. It was just the obvious winner.

So. Awkward. Brady was SO excited to set his grill up, but he opted instead to go run the carpet cleaner over our living room rug once more before bringing the thing back upstairs. So I have no picture for you! Sorry, guys! But, I can tell you the basics.

We bought a four burner grill, with a side burner, and a little cabinet underneath to hold the propane tank. Its stainless steal, pretty, with rose gold accents, so you know I also love it! Haha! Seriously though, of everything we saw that was even remotely close to our price range, this was the very best! Brady is psyched to get his grilling game on, and I’m psyched to participate in eating everything he grills.

Post-barbecue, we hit Superstore and Costco for food. We also (sadly) dropped off the guitar that Brady had rented from Long & McQuade for the last two months. We used it for our little “gig” the other day, we’ve used it in church, and he has really really enjoyed it! Maybe down the road, we’ll be able to foot the bill for a guitar like that, but not today, anyway. So he said an efficient, mournful goodbye and that was that. Hopefully the barbecue helps with the sting…

We’re keeping these little dears inside on such a hot, sticky day, and they’re even getting some tv into them, which weirdly happens very little these days! I never meant to phase tv out, but its kind of happened by accident?? Anyway, they’re all solidly entertained little zombies at the moment, Brady is washing that living room carpet, and I’m ready to be done blogging and find a position to sit in that allows me to breathe. Thats a luxury these days.

Have a lovely evening, friends, whether you’re in the sun or the A/C!!

Dekker had his second ever track and field day at school today! It was more in depth than last year, which makes sense. I imagine it’ll be more and more that way every year, or at least for a couple of years. As will likely be the case for every school event, I sadly can’t post many pictures, because there are just so many other kids in the background, and its obviously not up to me whether or not their pictures are allowed online. So, you’ll get a few shots of my kiddos, but thats it. Lucky for you, my phone was taking AMAZING pictures today, and they just look gorgeous!!

I am SO grateful that both Brady and my mom were able to make it out this year, because I could make it to my appointment this afternoon, my mom could stay with the nappers, and Brady could take Laela to the afternoon events. We had someone for everything! It felt a bit helter skelter, and we only have one kid in school this year! Its going to get tricky in the years to come, thats for sure!!

Dekker went through each event happily, unconcerned about where he placed or how anyone else did. With our last name being near the beginning of the alphabet, he has to go first for almost everything, which was really too bad last year, because he was so nervous. This year, he just went for it! We missed videos of a lot of his first runs at things, because he’d just go for it!

While the little boys napped, Brady took Laela to Dekker’s afternoon stuff.

The very last event was relays, and while it was on his schedule, we learned towards the end of the afternoon, the grade one class doesn’t do the relays. They’re welcome to go home early, or they could play outside for a bit and then go in and watch some videos. We opted to let him stay at school and play. I got back from my appointment in time to go get himself. And WOW, was he tired! Not grouchy, but super wiped out from his day! The teachers in his class had to kind of bring him “back” out of wherever he had zonked out to, and off we went.

The last picture of our sleepy little champion…

The dirt and condiments on his face, his sunscreen-slicked hair, and his tired smile read as a perfect day! Now wish us luck for the evening! Everyone is solidly overtired, even the nappers, and my body is pretty sore. Should be interesting, but all worth it for the busy day that was had.

Great job, Dekker!!! You did AWESOME! I’m SO proud of you!

Pregnant or not, sometimes figuring out what your body wants or needs is tricky. Answers are not always easy to come by, and leaves us wondering or, in my case, overthinking.

Last night, I thought I might be in early labour.

I spent from about 10:30pm-4:30am in pain, with lots of cramping and tightening. I dozed in and out as contractions seemed to come and go, but any and every time I woke up, I was in quite a bit of pain. On top of contractions, I swear my pelvis was the loosest its ever been. Every time I even shifted, it crunched in and out of place. SO painful! I didn’t want to overreact, wake the house, and head to the hospital, so I tried to figure it out on my own.

None of the pain even started until I lay down, which put a point in the “real contractions” column for me. Usually braxton hicks contractions calm themselves down with rest.

Nothing I did even slowed them. I get a lot more braxton hicks contractions when I have to pee, so every single time I lulled last night, I got up to pee. Didn’t make a difference. They just kept coming. Again, point for real contractions.

The pain wasn’t super bad. Like I said, I did doze and sleep bits here and there. I could walk through them and could’ve talked through them. Yet, my labours are odd, and its not unheard of for me to feel just vaguely uncomfortable right up to transition where the bomb drops. Sounded like labour to me.

My one hangup was that only the bottom half of my uterus seemed to be hardening. Maybe this isn’t all that strange, but it was new to me. In full blown labour, I remember less of how much it hurt (because of my weird labours) and more about how high up my stomach would turn to stone, and how it cut my breath short. That was not the case this time around. So, point for braxton hicks?

I woke up around 4:30 to what might have been my last cramp/contraction of the night. They haven’t returned. Painless braxton hicks are still in full force, but nothing like last night. I’m relieved, but also pretty interested in what happened last night. I have a prenatal tomorrow but I happen to know my family doctor is away tomorrow, so my student doctor will be overseen by another doctor. I’d SO much prefer to talk to Dr. Guselle about this, so I called her office first thing this morning, and it turns out she’s been out all week, today included. So, I wait for tomorrow.

In the meantime, here are my thoughts.

1. Maybe I got a little lick of labour! Ok, fair enough. Thanks for staying in there, little girl!
2. Maybe my body was super overtired from the day and the day before. Both were busy, productive days! Yesterday alone, we got car seats moved around in the van, including the infant seat!!! I got her cradle wiped down and ready for her. I got some dresser drawers reorganized in our room and hauled some garbage away. I planned a TON for the lake. Sorry, I’ll go into more detail on another day, but I did a lot yesterday. Maybe my body was legitimately just over it, and wanted to give me a (literal and figurative) wakeup call.
3. Maybe she dropped?? Yesterday was far more uncomfortable of a day than usual, very very low down. She seemed really shifty and unsettled, as if trying to get into place, maybe. So maaaybe my body was just making room and adjusting to her possibly having dropped lower.
4. Maybe this will be my life for the next 3.5 weeks…. I SUPER hope not!

It was a pretty off-putting night, I wont lie. It made me very nervous. I knew, if I called Health Line, they’d instruct me to go straight to the hospital. However, having a working husband and four young kids complicates that pretty significantly. Also the fact that I’ve never once went into labour on my own, and never early, leads me to think I won’t drop this baby anytime soon. Anything can happen, I know this, but I’m glad I stayed home and just toughed it out.

I’ll be spending the majority of today on my butt, accomplishing little to nothing productive, trying to rest my body. A hot soak tonight will hopefully do the trick and relax my big ole uterus for the night so I can be fresh in the morning! I can’t miss Dekker’s track and field day!!!

In many cases, sleeping until just before 8:00 would be an excellent night! Dekker used to sleep until noon most every day, and in turn, I was SO spoiled with sleeping in for the first couple of years of his life. Then, when he was two years and one month old, his sister was born, and from the very beginning of her life, it was clear that even her newborn self did not need as much sleep as his toddler self did. Thus began Hailey actually having to wake up at normal times in the morning. (Fun fact! Dekker and Laela are 25 months apart, and Solly and Bambina will be the same gap!) This system of sleeping in, or letting some of the kids sleep in to a degree, was glorious! However, school wrecked that for us.

SCHOOL!!!! Gah!

This morning, I woke up feeling SO nicely rested! The temperature in our room was nice, the darkening curtains were letting in just enough light to wake me up slowly, and I hadn’t had any leg spasms overnight, therefore no residual aches from them. I felt good. Until I checked the time. It was 7:54. And of course, its a school day. For reference, we always aim to leave around 8:25.

All the squishy, slow, morning vibes were out the window as I bolted out of bed to go throw some clothes on. For some reason, yesterday, I laid clothes out for today. I never ever do that. Ever. But thank goodness I did, because I was dressed in seconds and racing down to the kids rooms.

I went into Dekker and Rowan’s room first. They were both super cute, still in bed, in good moods. I explained to them what had happened, apologized that we’d have to rush this morning, and told them how this morning would look different. Both boys were on board, so I quickly pulled some clothes out for Dekker and he started getting dressed while I snagged Laela from the bathroom and told her the same stuff. Solly was talking a bit in his crib, but was totally happy, so I left him be for the time being.

I made Dekker’s lunch while he finished getting dressed, and when he came for breakfast, we improvised. We scrapped cereal for a granola bar, which he was completely thrilled about. He threw back a cup of milk, some yogurt, and his vitamins. The other kids wandered over, and also got their vitamins.

Oh shoot! The other kids!

I finished making Dekker’s lunch and retrieved Solly. He stunk. I went to change his diaper.

Shoot! Rowan needs a diaper change, too!

Two little poopers were refreshed and changed into new pants because theirs were just perpetually stinky.

When I came back out into the kitchen, Dekker had finished his breakfast. We had less than ten minutes before we usually leave. But the biggest part was over. Breakfast takes this group forever to eat, but the younger ones were totally willing to wait until we got home, which helped a LOT. Dekker hit the bathroom after he ate, to pee and brush his teeth. While he did that, Laela and Rowan set the breakfast table in preparation for our return.

Dekker was ready to go! Except that his hair was nuts, so we fixed that.

Then Dekker was ready to go, but he had a yogurt moustache. He laughed at himself and fixed that, too.

Into the entrance we all went to get our shoes on! The usual chaos ensues, but its the chaos that I actually secretly enjoy – when EVERYONE wants to get everyone’s shoes for them, and they fight because they ALL want to get their own shoes. Today, though, everyone seemed on point and listened as their siblings shrieked about which footwear they wanted that day. Laela chose her most complicated sandals, but assured me she’s close the door behind her and come in a minute. Yay for independence!

Dekker ran ahead to the van, I walked with the little boys, and Laela came seconds later. Two kids buckled themselves in, I buckled in the other two, and got myself into the drivers seat.

Took a deep breath. Checked the time.

We were literally only TWO MINUTES behind the time that we usually leave the house! Not late at all!

We drove Dekker to school, checked the mail, and came back home. Everyone was still in good shape. They put their shoes away and headed right to the table. Cereal and milk were poured, prayers were said, and eating began. No one missed a beat. It seemed like I was really the only one that took a hit this morning. But seriously, forget my delicious wake up and restful night. I could fall asleep this very moment, thanks only to that ridiculous half hour.

Coffee is not helping…..

So many of you have said to me over time that you feel like you know Jerilee, just based on reading posts. I like to think the vibe is pretty accurate 😉 Today is Jerilee’s birthday! Its s significant one *cough* 30 *cough* and I’m sure she’d vastly prefer that I gloss over it, buuuuut she probably also knows that I won’t, and she’ll still be friends with me. Let’s make that first one the list! (This list has been compiled by myself, my husband, my mom, and my kids, aka Jerilee’s biggest fans!)

1. Nothing even comes between she and I for very long before all is right with the world again. We do disagree from time to time, though not too often, and it never gets too awkward for very long.
2. Jerilee’s sense of humor is wonderfully dry and sarcastic. It has some good shock value thrown in there, also, complete wiiiiith…
3. Her beautiful laugh! 😂
4. She is a wonderful listener, even if the subject isn’t something she directly relates to or would normally need to know about. She makes the speaker feel valuable.
5. I’m trying not to make the whole thing about this one, but I LOVE that she loves my kids so well! 💖 She’ll play hide and seek, help Dekker with his homework, and will read and play games on the floor with them for longer than I even do!
6. Jerilee is trustworthy with secrets! Its possible she’s known this baby’s name long before anyone else! 🤫
7. She keeps us fuddy duddies in the loop with what the cool kids are saying 😉 Brady even says “totes” now, haha!
8. When Jerilee is in a bad mood or has had a rough day, she still manages to pull it together to be around people. To be clear, she’s MORE than allowed to be grumpy with us, and doesn’t sugarcoat it, but she has a nice way of still being super lovely to be around, even when she’s sad. What a wonderful quality!
9. Once upon a time, years ago, I was pregnant with Rowan, and we couldn’t find his heartbeat at an appointment. I had to wait TWO DAYS before I could get checked, and in those days, Jerilee brought me a party. 🎉 She brought my favorite soup, freshly made, a cake, hats, and something to do, and she distracted me for the entire day in between appointments. It. Was. Awesome. THAT is what friends are for!
10. She supports my unreasonable obsession with pineapples even though she is deathly allergic to them.
11. She is someone you can visit with, or be quiet with. Both are equally comfortable and enjoyable.
12. She has great taste in music! I think we agree on almost all of it!
13. Jerilee sees needs, and fulfills them. When we moved to our home two years ago, once everyone was done for the day, she went to the kitchen and shifted things off countertops and chairs, and got the room actually solidly useable, rather than just littered with boxes that would likely have been there for the next several days. She just knew how much easier that would make life.
14. She makes sacrifices for those around her, all the time. For instance, she’s skipping an important event in order to make it to the baby party, and thats only ONE example.
15. Of ALL the salespeople in the world, she is one of the few that is NOT pushy and overpowering! This is an amazing quality when it comes to sales, I find. She is the girl to go to!
16. I love her bangs!!
17. She encourages those around her and brings them value. I know I’ve felt it, and I’ve watched my kids puff up when she compliments their great pictures, abilities, etc.
18. Road trips are the BEST with Jerilee! She rolls with the punches if plans change, but is reliable when they don’t.
19. She is an involved friend and auntie to my kids. She makes the drive our way for birthdays, Christmas concerts, whatever she can get to. Even if they’re lame and disorganized. Last year, when Laela turned 4, we went and played at the playground. That was the “event.” And she came, just to be present! It was WONDERFUL.
20. Jerilee is ferociously strong, and can handle a LOT. But, on the days that she can’t, she will let herself be vulnerable, and I’m so thrilled to be her safe place to fall 🤗
21. I really appreciate that she will go outside of her comfort zone to bless her friends. She even braved the hospital and came to visit me when I was waiting for Jamin to be born. Anything could’ve happened in those hours, we both knew it, and she was up for the task! It was such a blessing to have some normalcy, and some laughs with my best friend, while I went through something super hard.
22. She is one of the few humans on earth who appreciate eating tuna on a regular basis. 🐟
23. Solly loves to scale his Aunty Jerry like a building and wrestle her 🤼
24. I love her itty bitty princess sneeze 🤧
25. Jerilee has wonderful taste in shoes, but poor judgement on when to bring which shoes where 😉
26. Laela LOVES that Aunty always has videos of her puppy videos on her phone 🐶🐶
27. Rowan says he loves sharing his stuffed toys with Aunty, very likely because she always lovingly accepts them. 🐻🦊🦊
28. Dekker loves that she reads stories very clearly, lol!
29. We all love Jerilee’s gentle spirit.
30. Laela keeps telling me she likes doing all kinds of things with Jerilee that they’ve never actually done together, so I’m taking that to mean that Laela loves having Jerilee in our lives, and hopes to have her around for much, much longer.

I know my dear Jerilee, my best friend, has not been eagerly anticipating this birthday, but I am thrilled and honoured to have known her for this second half of her life. Fifteen years have been great, and I hope there are many, many more. In talking with Dekker about birthdays today, he commented that, when he turns 100, he will be SO STRONG. I love that he associates aging with strength rather than weakness, and I agree 100%. Jerilee, girl, you are STRONGER than you were a year ago, and I am PROUD of where you are in your life, what you’re doing, and who you have become! I hope you keep me around to see how you keep growing and changing, because I’ve so enjoyed it thus far. Anyone who is a friend of yours is a lucky one.

I am SO lucky!! 💞