I fear that today’s post will do zero justice to the man who is the father of my children. But I will try. Words cannot express.
Brady has worked HARD since we had children to be a different kind of dad. One who is involved. Hands on. Emotionally connected and invested. Loving and gentle. Authoritative and safe. A father who makes no stereotypical comments of what “men don’t do.” He has diapered, fed, bathed, tucked in, and parented exactly the same amount as I do. He loves his boys and girls the same. There is no favouritism, and there are no excuses.
Then, February happened, and Brady was gone for more than two months. He came home paralyzed in the midst of cancer treatment that was kicking his butt.
And guess what. There were still no excuses.
Of course he wasn’t expected to do all the same things, and we had a TON of help. We still do. But his character did not. He is still the same man. Involved. Hands on. Emotionally invested. Loving. Gentle. Authoritative. Safe.
Roles have changed, of course, and there is a post about that to come, but Brady’s role as his children’s father has NOT. His wheelchair and spinal cord injury have not taken anything away in terms of his fatherhood.
Or, for that matter, in terms of his role as my husband. He is exactly the same man, if not stronger!!! I would confidently say our family is more tight knit than its ever been, and our marriage is thriving. We are healthy in the ways that are most important, and for that, I am SO grateful. Things would not be so smooth if not for God’s grace, and Brady’s willingness to accept the situation he’s in and roll (ha!) with it. His determination has always been one of his most stand-out qualities, but its really showing itself in a brighter light now, as if that is possible.
All glory to God! Thank you for this beautiful man you’ve placed in our lives. I couldn’t have asked for a better father for my children.
Brady is on day 7 of his 28 day cycle. Ha! That sounds like I’m talking about his period. I’m not. I’m talking about chemotherapy. If you missed the post about the details of his treatment plan, I wrote it all out here.
This won’t be an especially long post, but that is actually a really good thing.
He took his first dose on Friday, before bed, at the lake. By the light of a solar pineapple.
We’ve been instructed that no one but him should really even touch the pills, because they’re dangerous chemicals. So thats a fun thing to think about as he’s swallowing them. I went to the kitchen and stood with him as he cracked everything out onto a kleenex. We prayed together, and then he took his first dose. Boom. There you have it. 320 mgs of temozolomide.
We were prepared for the worst. Brought lots of nausea medication. Gatorade. Ginger ale.
Brady suffered ZERO side effects from his chemotherapy treatment! PRAISE GOD!!!!! 😭
He took his five doses over five days, and there was no “hit.” That doesn’t mean there won’t be one. We are not completely blind to the possibilities. Everyone has a different experience. But many say the treatment days are the worst for pain, sickness, and discomfort, and they were completely manageable. Nothing changed. It was amazing.
There are more treatments to come. At least five more. Up to twelve altogether. That part is still uncertain. But we ask that you continue to carry us in prayer. We are still swirling in uncertainty, but are grateful for the smooth sailing thus far. We trust God has a plan, and is carrying it out in the way He sees fit. We are here, and we are His.
Goodnight, guys. Did you LOVE the storm yesterday?? I know not everyone is up for storms, but I love them. I have for a very, very long time. I don’t particularly love a good tornado warning, but I love rain and the kind of weather you just want to sit at your window and watch! We had some of that yesterday.
While the kids read in the living room before bed, Brady, Cher, and I went outside on the deck and watched the clouds. They were INCREDIBLE!!!
But seriously, they just got better and better. I don’t know if I’ve ever seen clouds like these. They were magnificent!
My favorite picture I took…
Isn’t it bananas??? 😍 The three of us were just dazzled. We didn’t want to go inside, even as the wind tried to push us off the deck or knock our phones out of our hands.
We love storms. I am SO grateful Brady didn’t miss any big ones while we were apart. Thank you, Cher, for documenting our celebration! Hahaha!
It was a good day yesterday. A good storm. I hope there are many more.
Do you remember way back when I laughed at the fact that Brady’s phone was trying to count his steps, and was gently chastising his lack of walking? We laugh at stuff like that ALL the time. But today, one of his sponsored ads on Facebook really took the cake!
A standing desk. Because clearly, that makes great sense for someone in his position. I’m not sure what tipped the internet off to offer Brady this item, but at the very least, we got a good giggle out of it. And I hope you did too.
And if you didn’t, I’m sorry, because that is truly all I have for you today…
We took the kids to the camper this weekend! It was finally time! We packed the best we could while they were at school on Friday, and Cher sent us off around 4:00.
The seven of us, plus my mom, drove the stretch to the lake and ate Mississippi Chicken on a bun upon arriving. YUM!
It was a busy evening, getting everyone settled in, but they were excited to sleep in bunks again and to be free to run and play a lot further than they do here at home.
We had Costco muffins for breakfast, which may be cheating, but is SO well received and I have zero regrets about!
We spent the morning doing some jobs around the site. I levelled some of the dirt we had dug out last weekend for the deck, and Brady fixed the plumbing that wasn’t quite right. We were both pretty wiped, but Brady looked fly.
My mom provided super yummy lunches both days. My FAVORITE kind of lunch – fruit, crackers, cheese, meat, etc.
The kids had some quiet time, and so did the rest of us.
We sat on the deck, sunbathed, scrolled, and sipped. I made a lake version of myself on Voila.
It had rained pretty hard the day before, but it was all dried out enough to have a fire later in the day!! It was SO nice!! Brady can still chop wood! Heyo!!! Just not on a chopping block, lol! (definitely wrote “chopping blog” first, haha!)
Once the fire was going strong, Brady got the BBQ fired up, and we had burgers and hot dogs for supper. And veggies. And chips. It was so delicious.
The golf cart was a HUGE hit! Solly worked his muscles…
But it was MOST fun was fitting EVERYONE getting to ride TOGETHER! (Trust me when I say Rowan was actually SUPE enjoying himself! He just grumped for the picture. Because why not.)
I LOVE this picture! I wish Rowan was happy in it, but 🤷♀️c’est la vie.
The kids ran around the beach and raced up and down the dock, and Brady and I opted for laziness and rest, haha!!
The next morning, we decided to thrill everyone’s hearts, and we made a morning fire and had s’mores for breakfast!! The kids were STOKED.
Everyone was pretty stinking cute, if you ask me.
The big highlight for the kids after breakfast was a gross caterpillar, hahaha! They were oddly attached to it, but let it go on their own eventually, thank goodness.
My mom walked the kids to the beach to play while Brady and I did a few things in the afternoon. I continued shovelling, and Brady fixed an exterior outlet that quit working when we moved the camper here.
Aaaaand now it works! So we can plug our golf cart in to charge without having to have the door slightly ajar and an extension cord running underfoot.
I will be honest – it was a tough first weekend with the kids. They were SO excited and therefore SO overstimulated and my goodness, it was pretty hard. Nights were really difficult, and that made daytime attitudes that much more challenging. It was new. So it was hard.
It seems that a LOT of people are stoked about an app that animates people’s faces in all kinds of different ways. I saw many different versions online, and I was intrigued! So I tried it! Aaaaand I tried it for my whole family! I hope you enjoy!!
Personally, I think these are the cutest things!! Definitely an enjoyable way to waste a little time, if you’ve got some to spare.
You probably remember that time we had to shave Waverly’s head. If you don’t remember, you probably have noticed she has oddly shorter hair than one might think we’d keep on our children. I LOVE our long haired kids, but clearly I LOVE the short haired ones, too. When Wavy’s hair started to fall out after a particularly vicious rash/illness last summer, she began to eat it. Nope nope nope. We shaved it off fairly quickly one realizing the damage that could cause. It was hard, but necessary.
We shaved it a few times for a few appointments, but then we let it grow. Because it would still be a good while before it was actually long enough for her to pull it again, and she would likely lose the habit before then.
So far so good!
Wavy has reached an adorable state of “shaggy dog” and I love it so much. She’s bleaching out good and proper in the sun, and she just looks like summer with her little overgrown pixie cut!
I had been in touch with my hair girl around the time I shaved Wavy, and she said she could help me when the time came, and we could trim Wavy’s hair up nicely so she’d look a little cleaned up and feminine. I completely expected to take her up on this offer.
Until…
She grew a ringlet in the back!!!
It may look rat taily for the moment, but you better believe its staying!! I choose to believe it will soon be surrounded by many other curly friends!
Well, friends, we have news. It won’t be all too shocking, as we knew what was coming in Brady’s treatment. But suddenly its RIGHT around the corner.
Brady’s first round of chemotherapy starts today.
Barf.
For those who would like details, Brady is taking Temozolomide. Also called Temodar, it is a common chemotherapy treatment used in the treatment of many brain tumours. Brady’s particular tumour ONLY grows in the brain or spinal cord, but aaaaalmost NEVER in the spinal cord. Its “better” but its lesser known. This chemo treatment is the most logical bet, and it is also considered to be a mild chemo. It will go in 28 day cycles. In his case, Brady will take these four pills (to get the dosage just right) before bed for five days consecutively. He already has nausea medication on hand and more on file. Once days 1-5 are done, he has no pills or treatment from days 6-28. Right at the end of the cycle, he will go for bloodwork and make sure things are going smoothly in terms of white blood cells, and then onto the next cycle. He will do anywhere from six to twelve cycles. It just depends on how it goes. We don’t know. So we’re just starting.
He will NOT be at the hospital for his treatments. He will NOT have a port. He will NOT be restricted in many ways that many other cancer sufferers are. We have no idea how sick he will or won’t get, but we are hoping to waste as much of these chemo months at the lake, where time doesn’t matter, we have no expectations or deadlines, and we can be restful. God protect us.
I share this with you in an effort to ask for your continued support, prayers, and care. Uncertainty is mentally, emotionally, and physically exhausting, and we have a LOT of it. Conveniently, we’re told chemo is also exhausting in all the same ways. So we’re entering this next stage of our lives uncertain, apprehensive, and relying FULLY on God.
To be clear, I do NOT share this because I want to hear any negative stories. Encouragement is welcome, but please don’t shower us with the stories of bad outcomes. Trust me, we’ve done our research and are not going into this blindly. We are aware of the risks. We are also aware of the risks of not doing chemo, so we’ve prayerfully chosen this route and are trusting God to protect Brady.
Excuse us as we take the weekend away with our family, and navigate these first few days. We have no idea what they hold. But God does, thankfully. So we plod on.
Ok, almost everything. We tried! And we took selfies all along the way, so be ready to see a lot of our faces. You’ve been warned.
We left in the late morning, and headed to Martensville. I dropped Brady off at Canadian Tire to grab some plumbing parts for the camper…
…and I drove to McDonalds to grab some quick, cheap lunch. We had GOALS!
From there, we made our way to the blood clinic in the Lawson area. We did not plan ahead, but thankfully, the wait time wasn’t bananas, and Brady was able to get his blood draw in no time.
See the thing was he had an appointment to get to at 1:30, and we had a LOT on the list for the day, so we were trying to crush as many things as possible before his appointment.
From that blood clinic to another, we drove to RUH. I went in to get blood work that I was supposed to get in January. Whoops.
I wanted for an uncool twenty and resent my requisition twice before I said I had to go, but I would come back after our appointment. Merp.
We walked to the other end of the hall and registered Brady for his appointment with *drumroll please* his surgeon, Dr. Fourney! We just got a call from his office that he wanted a follow-up with Brady, and we’ve both been looking forward to it.
He was running late, but Dr. Fourney did not disappoint. I can go into deeper detail in an upcoming post, but what I will say is that he has real confidence that Brady’s tumour will not grow, and that he doesn’t feel that Brady’s cancer diagnosis is as aggressive as some others are saying and believing. He isn’t by any means casting us aside or not caring about the outcome, and backed up everything he said with real information and practical understanding. We will still be going forward with all of our current plans, but hearing his confidence was very comforting and reassuring. He feels much like we do. A fun bonus of that appointment was that he really recognized Brady’s drive, determination, and positive attitude. He said that is a HUGE part of the reason Brady is healing so well, and I fully agree. Obviously, we give ALL glory to God! But yes, Brady has chosen to grab the wheelchair by the horns and keep rolling! (Ha!) And its working. It was a very uplifting appointment.
I went back to the blood clinic after the appointment and they still didn’t have anything. They said come back another day. I told them I wouldn’t be back in the area anytime soon, and they said sorry. So, I left. Merp. Did I mentioned I NEED it soon because I have a day surgery coming up?! GAH!
The Cancer Centre was just across the parking lot, so Brady dropped in there, too, to pick up some meds.
From there, we drove to Saskabilities, where Brady’s brace was being modified. I’m realizing now I should’ve taken a picture of how it looks now, but this will have to do!
His brace used to have his foot fixed Ken doll style, and now the ankle has a hinge! Woot! More mobility is always a win!
Then we hit Walmart. We were SO far across the city, and we never get to the Stonebridge Walmart. See the thing is, I crocheted a project, and I am barely short just ONE color! I’m a little annoyed, because it only comes in a huge ball, and its not even very soft, nice yarn, and I need sooooo little. But, I couldn’t find it at the other locations, so aaaaall the way to Stonebridge, and I can finally bring that purple home and finish my project!
Only mildly passive aggressive about it.
We also got chips and some better plates for camping from Walmart. It was a successful stop!
Aaaaand on the way home, we filled up with gas and bought a few brews from the “scratches and dents” bin! For the laaaaake tomorrowwwww!
We got home shortly after 4:00, and at 5:00, someone from a Saskatoon-based driving school came and picked Brady up. And by “picked Brady up” I mean he showed Brady how to use hand controls, then jumped in the passenger seat, and Brady drove him around Saskatoon until he got home around 7:15.
He had so much fun, and is excited to be approved to get hand controls installed in our vehicle! Apparently it started to feel second nature by the time he was on his way home 🙂 I’m SO proud!
Its been a good day. A HUGE day, but a productive, enjoyable day. We got SO much done! Almost everything 😒I’m still calling it a victory. There is a LOT to come, but we’re doing our best over here. Still, friends, I am overwhelmingly grateful for the help and care we’ve been receiving. I do not take it for granted!
Its an oddly unsettled, discouraging time in some ways. It never hurts to share joy, tho! So in no particular order, here are five things that make me happy.
Sleeping. Whether its me or them, I love sleeping. You know that joke people make about how, as teens, all we wanted to do was stay up, and now we cannot wait for bedtime? That rings truer to me now than it ever has before, and consider that I had five children before Brady was paralyzed and diagnosed with cancer. That is how tired I am, hahaha! So, I’m pretty much in a relationship with sleep.
White macaroni makes me happy. It has to be Presidents Choice, and it has to be el dente. Made with juuust a little extra milk to get it super creamy. Made perfectly, this is SUCH an indulgence for me! Yum! Brady and I may have eaten two boxes of it last night in bed after the kids went down for the night. Maybe.
Brady makes me happy. He is the epitome of man. The ultimate husband to me and father to our children. I could not have chosen a better person to do life with. Seriously. We have such a good thing going, and I am incredibly grateful for a healthy marriage. Being apart those nine weeks made us even stronger. Don’t get me wrong, I super hated it, haha! Because, as mentioned, Brady makes me happy. I’m so grateful to God that he came back home to me.
Finding the end of the yarn that pulls from the middle makes me happy! Only some of you will understand this one, but trust me, this is HUGE! Especially with these huge skeins of yarn, that piece is almost impossible to find, and most of the time, you end up just unrolling it from around the outside, and the stupid ball of yarn rolls all over the place. Finding the one from the centre is victory! And I FOUND one!!! And it made me happy!!! (Just you guys wait for the post showing you what I’ve all been working on!! Eek! Projects!!!!!)
And snuggling with my kids makes me happy. I’ve had the privilege of getting closer to my Solly, as he is SUCH a daddys boy! He still LOVES his dad, don’t get me wrong, but its like he sees the value in me, too. He is a total snuggler with me now, and I LOVE it! I often find myself with a kid on either side, or one will just walk by and flop onto my lap. Legs are always tangled in mine, a head is always on my chest, and hair is always in my mouth. But tt is a true treasure, and one I feel very fortunate to know.
I feel so fortunate. Even amidst these darker times, I have joy. We are happy and secure and faith-filled. Uncertainty is there, but not in the forefront. We are breathing in and out, and moving forward. God knows what we need.
