The Daily Hailey

I went and got my blood taken this morning. This will hopefully be the last time I’ll have to fuss over the physical, medical parts of losing our baby. No more scans, and no more blood work. I’m hoping, anyway. I don’t know for sure what the results will be yet. Until my HCG levels are at zero, I’ll need to keep going back. This is all reopening those feelings I’ve had about anticipating it all being over. They feel crappy, and as I’ve said a number of times, I DO NOT DESIRE for him to be gone. I would give just about anything to keep him safe and alive in my body. I do not like “wanting” him out. But I do understand it, and I don’t think anyone who knows me at all thinks I didn’t want him, and am happy he’s gone. Quite the contrary.

The blood clinic was packed in a way I have never witnessed. There were 20 names on the board, and people were consistently at the desk, checking themselves in and being added to the waiting list. Thankfully, I had asked Brady to check me in online first. Because of that, I waited less than five minutes before going back and getting my blood drawn.

The last few times I’ve gone in, I’ve had the same nurse. She is very efficient, but thats basically all I can say. She doesn’t look a person in the eye, or give ANYTHING extra. I know she’s not required to, but being someone who is not fond of blood work, I appreciate someone who can offer me a bit of banter and distraction. I was really happy to see someone entirely different this time! She was upbeat and chatty, but also very efficient, which was really good, considering the standing room only waiting area. The tension in that clinic today was high. MUCH higher than usual. People were noticeably unhappy, and overwhelmed with the amount of people. When someone would get called back, everyone stared at the open chair. Just in the few minutes I was there, anyway, each time a chair opened, a man immediately took it. While I am completely able bodied and fine to stand, I could see women roll their eyes every time. I’m not saying right or wrong, but just that the tension was palpable. I was pretty relieved when my name was called. I liked my nurse a lot, because she was making a clear effort to be positive and bubbly. It was quite relaxing, even though I was having blood drawn.

From there, I headed back home and fed the kids lunch. The little boys are napping and the big kids are watching some tv and playing Lego. Brady is at work, probably for a longer day than usual, and as for me, I’m trying to plan my week! We found out today that we can get a real start on our basement THIS WEEKEND! Which is both awesome and a bit ominous, as thats coming up fast and we want to be nice and prepared, and its going to take some work. Luckily, we’re having some friends help us, and they’ll likely be more relaxed if we’re not perfectly ready right off the hop, like if things need to be moved around while they work. I’m SO excited that things are going to start!!! I’m more than ready to get things moving on that.

In today’s case, probably a later post would have been smarter, because maybe I would have results from my blood work. But I much prefer to blog in the day, and I can just tell you guys results tomorrow, or whenever I get them.

I’ll leave you with some cute pictures of the kids from yesterday, because I can’t resist.

GAH! Aren’t they adorable?! I accidentally colour themed them, so we couldn’t not take a picture. Or twenty five pictures…

Have a great Monday!