Today was a really good day. I slept in a little bit and we had pancakes for lunch. We did a bit of laundry and the kids played well. Brady bathed them and they went down for a nap just before 1:30pm. It was an incredibly smooth day.
So, apparently we felt like poking the bear, and we decided to spend the evening in the city, running errands. I’m not sure if I’ve talked in detail about this before, but Brady and I made a conscious decision a while back to give Dekker a break from crowds and places we knew made him nervous. I fully believe that kids need to learn, even if they need to be uncomfortable sometimes, so we pushed him on things like that for a good long while, but his volume only went up, and his level of panic escalated with eat outing. So we stopped. I didn’t go anywhere without leaving him with my mom, or taking someone with me to sit in the van with him. I’ve worried that I sound like I don’t like him, or don’t want to deal with him. That is absolutely not the case. We weighed our options and just felt led to give him that rest. For a few months, he wasn’t put in any group situation, minus church. And today, we had plans to go to a number of places.
So when the littles woke up, we got them all excited with the promise of a trip and french fries. We all got put together and ready, and guys, they are just he cutest little things.
I almost didn’t dress them so cute, since they attract enough attention as it is, and today was going to be something of a “first day back” experience. But they’re adorable no matter what, so we went with it.
We started at Walmart. Did you know Walmart carts aren’t made for two little kids to sit in? Only one. That is Dekkers safe spot. Always. But Laela isn’t in a bucket anymore, and the reality is she needs to sit in there. Dekker was a bit put off to begin with, and asked to sit, but we said we’d hold hands instead. So we all held hands in a row, which was cute. We had no real deadline, so we doddled to the back and found Laela some new socks, as hers are super tiny now. Dekker diligently took them from me and put them in the cart. From then on, he helped. He pushed the cart (as much as he could) and he participated in picking things. He even chose Laela a pair of shoes off of a shelf and put them in the cart. Unfortunately, she doesn’t need size eight shoes anytime soon, but they were cute, so it counts. We purchased the seventh season of Big Bang Theory, as well as Little Rascals, which was only $5. Aaand we got his Halloween costume! So it was a big win. We lined up in the express line, and as soon as there were people in front of and behind us, he got a bit twitchy. He started to get nervous, and asked to be held. I got down on the ground with him and we talked about waiting in the line, like everyone else, and when the line was all done, we were going to go out for supper. This would sooth him for a solid ten seconds before he’d ask again. So it became more of a mantra. After the twentieth time of comforting him, the girl behind us piped up with “You guys are so cute.” I thanked her, and explained that he is usually pretty scared of new people, and we were making a point to keep him calm and encouraged. She was really great and understanding, and gave Dekker some space while engaging Laela. Laela kind of just started her down, but as the kind stranger pointed out herself, the lip ring and long blue hair often got her the same reaction. We visited the rest of the time we were in line, and Dekker was totally calm! From there, we went to buy our stuff, and I’ll admit, my breath caught in my throat as the cashier ran through our two bags of apples and said “Oh boy, you must really like apples, huh?” to Dekker. He backed up a bit and leaned into Bradys leg, but didn’t even make his whiny “warning sound.” I bent down a bit and asked him if he liked apples, and he put on his beautiful, charmer smile and said “yaaaaa…” I was so thrilled!!! Right then and there, I praised him up and told him he did sooo well being friendly. “Thanks!” he said. He seemed pretty pleased with himself. On the way out, he grabbed both my and Bradys hands, and shouted “Run run run!” We raced out to the van, got inside, and peeled out of the parking lot, as Dekker was more than ready for fries.
Before fries, however, I stopped off at a house to pick up new iPhone cases for Brady and I off of a kijiji deal. They are Lifeproof, but are definite knock-offs. I’m personally not put off by that though. The real ones are super expensive, and while these ones are a bit less durable than those ones, they’re still better than a basic plastic case that cracks when dropped on carpet. Our kids don’t play with our phones either, so the risk is minimal. I got a pink one and Brady got blue. They’re cute.
We went for supper afterwards. We all had our long-anticipated fries, and the rest of our meals. Dekker has only recently discovered ketchup. I’ve never had an issue with him having dip, but he’s never needed it. He finally asked to taste it the other day, and he likes it. So he was thrilled that they had ketchup at the restaurant. He ate more than his share of fries, and Laela enjoyed some as well. Once we were getting to the end of the food, Jerilee got off work, and I convinced her to come visit us before going home. I ordered us a communal ice cream to eat while we waited. And I have to say, that did the trick. Dekker was a riot after that. I’m confident the sugar played a huge role, but he was officially brave. He would wander from the table, make eye contact with strangers, talk out loud, play games, and likely, be that kid in the restaurant that people roll their eyes at and say “Why don’t parents control their kids?” I was sooo happy he was happy! And no, he wasn’t bouncing off the walls or disturbing people. Otherwise yes, we would have calmed him down. We’re not animals. But he was so happy his Auntie Jerry was there, and that he could tell her stories about his day. He had such a good day, and was eager to share.
We made one more stop before we left, and it was totally fruitless. I just ran in, and ran out empty handed. Unimportant. We drove home after that, and Dekker requested some music. He played with the toy from his kids meal and listened to some Pitch Perfect while Laela dozed beside him. When we got home, I went to get him from his spot. He came out of the van and I just went down on my knees and hugged him. I told him how proud I was of how friendly he had been to everyone, and how patient he was when he was waiting for his food. He had just been a really fun person to hang out with that day. He gave me a long hug and a big kiss. We looked at the stars a little bit together before he said “Ready to have a diaper change and a sleep” and headed for the house. Unbelievable.
We timed everything a little bit badly, getting home so late, so we tucked Dekker in before feeding Laela some milk. She sucked it back and was more than ready to go to sleep. She was SUCH a little peach this evening as well, not once making a fuss or a scene. Just being the cute little eye candy in her hoodie and pink pants. The only noise she made was a slightly screechy “Mamamama!” when she wanted another taste of ice cream. I loved that.
So again, I say, today was pretty wonderful. I’m not saying I’m ready to take the kids out on errands myself just yet, since this was our first successful outing in a very, very long time, but this gives me hope. Hope that we’ll be able to go again, just me and the kids. I love those kids!
