The Daily Hailey

The days are fairly swirly in terms of emotions lately. Hardships where someone we love left. Celebrations when cancer treatment is on pause. Relief and comfort when people come around and show us love in different ways. We really have so much to be thankful for. Always.

Today I actually left the house for a few hours to run some errands. I brought Laela and Rowan with me, as well as the two little ones. Brady stayed home with Dekker, Wavy and Solly. We made a stop at our eye care place for a visit, a few hugs and gifts of love, and then headed to the city. We hit Value Village for some school shoes, some shirts for some of the boys, some books, and not much else. It was quick and also low pressure. Mostly I’m just relieved to get the shoes off the list of things to organize before school starts.

It was honestly really nice to be out and about again like normal, but I did feel quite exhausted afterwards. No real reason for it, but its true. I guess I’m quite drained lately, coming down from all the treatments and the lead up to one of our littles leaving.

Brady has napped all afternoon. I think once the kids are down for night, I’m going to wake him up and make his eat with me. A delicious taco salad meal was delivered to our door and I’m excited to get some of it into my belly! 😋

I promise I am perfectly aware of the purpose of foster care. I KNOW that kids come and go. Trust me, I am completely informed. It doesn’t make it easy, though.

Yesterday, we didn’t realize until the meal was over that Wavy had accidentally set a plate for our dear one who moved along.

I don’t know. It felt like a hit. Rowan said we should just leave it there for memories, but we still have handsy little ones who run around and pull everything down from everywhere, so I had to veto. Everyone felt the sting, though.

I thank the family who stepped up for this child, though, for caring about our family in the process. It has not been a “cut and run” situation, and for that, I am so grateful.

Cher here

Do you remember when Rowan and Brady had super long hair? One morning after coffee, we convinced Brady into letting us straighten his hair just for this photo. However, by lunch time the curls had returned and our efforts were no longer visible. 

Super satisfying while it lasted though. How cute is this photo?!

Nowadays Brady is rocking a short cut as it makes the most sense with surgery and radiation. They have a very skilled neighbor who cleans everyone up so nice. 

I love that Rowan is growing his hair out again. I wonder how long he will let it get. 

Both are handsome no matter what. Hair is just an accessory! 

Today was Brady’s LAST radiation appointment! Transport came early and it all felt pretty scrambly, but still, we made it!

We were brought in a little bit early. Everyone was upbeat and friendly. Congratulating Brady on graduating out of radiation therapy. 🥳

Treatment was quick and painless. Nothing long and drawn out, but the company was lovely and warm. They didn’t talk about ringing the bell. Brady didn’t want to, anyway. We were just ready to be done, and thats ok.

We waited only a short time for our transport to come back for us. Again, the ride was simple and and driver was kind. We’ve gotten to know a couple of the drivers with Prairie Path, and they are all really, really good guys.

We got home shortly after Cher left from doing some cleaning (thank you!) and just a few minutes after home care pulled up. Once we got inside and Brady was in bed, the nurse came and knocked. She checked over Brady’s wound and graduated him out of daily appointments!! 🥳 Another last that we’ve been eagerly anticipating! Thank you, Lord, for lining up both things on the same day. Our schedule can actually belong to us again 💜 How we have missed that.

Now, the man will nap, and the babies won’t be far behind. Coffee is ready for the afternoon, thanks to Cher.

A little bit of breathing time and some relief before heading out to do one more hard thing for the day 💪

Congrats, Brady. That was a long trek. I love you. 💜

We’re going to be saying goodbye to one of our sweethearts shortly. I really can’t say more, as you guys know and I’m sure understand. We feel very fortunate to have built a friendship and good rapport with family, and I feel hopeful that this is not the forever end of us having a connection with this dear child. But even when its smooth, those transitions are always a bit of a gut punch.

AS THEY SHOULD BE, BECAUSE THESE KIDS NEED PEOPLE TO ATTACH TO THEM AND LOVE THEM LIKE FAMILY!! ITS IMPORTANT, AND NECESSARY, AND PART OF IT!! NO REGRETS WHATSOEVER!

But. Still hard. Obviously.

Today, we celebrate the incredible time we’ve spent with this child. And what will we eat to sorrowbrate?

KID FOOD!!!!

Fries. Chicken nuggets. Seasonings. Dip. LOTS of dip. And fruit. Because, really, what kid wants to eat anything else? Bonus points for it being easy, because thats a huge help when things are extra challenging. Popsicles for dessert. We will end the day on a sticky, happy, hyper note, as I know this child (and all the others) will greatly appreciate. Making all the memories we can.

Galatians 6:9 reads “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.”

Cher here

I just think it’s important for the Bornchives to document why I call Dekker Dave, and Brady Greggy. I think the stories have been told before, but a focused blog seems easier for kids and grandkids to find one day… and this is very important information.

First, just days after Waverly was born in 2018, Brady was going through a Tim’s drive thru for his mobile order.

“For Brady” he said into the speaker box. “For who?!” The employee replied through their headset. “BRADY” he clarified.

“Okay, pull ahead Greggy” he said.

Hailey and I were new friends but she made sure to tell me right when it happened as she was absolutely losing it. It was so hysterical. And from that day on, I have called him Greggy.

Dekker’s turn.

Wavy was maybe a few months old and Dekker was in big brother mode. In fact, he was in big brother mode so much that he was almost like a mini dad. Dekker has a fun and silly side for sure but at 6 he was very no-nonsense with kids and babies.

One day we all went for a walk around the pond and he asked to push Wavy in the stroller with his very mature little voice. Ahead of us he went. I will never forget seeing him with his cargo shorts and a belt pushing a stroller he could barely see over.

“He is SUCH a Dave” I said to Hailey. She agreed.

And the rest is history. 

To top it all off, Hailey bought Dekker a hat that says “I’m Dave doing Dave things” and he wears it everyday.

It feels so recent that Dekker was born. And now, here he goes, turning fifteen like a BIG BOY! 🥹

This boy has CHANGED over this last year, WOW!!!

He has let his hair grow out. His whole face has changed, down to the eyebrows!

He looks like such a MAN! He is as tall as me, and his feet are gigantic! 😳🙌 Bigger than Bradys! His learners license is in hand, and he has been waiting for this day! Its possible we have pictures of him opening the letter from SGI.

Dekker settled into senior high activities this last school year. He learned how to manage some hard things, rose above some big challenges, and even got some heck at school when he finally stood up for himself. To be clear, I did not give him heck. It was time. And even in that kind of moment, he didn’t overdo anything. He has incredible self control and awareness.

This year, Dekker has become invested in his 3D printer, and loves to make gifts or funny pranks for the people he loves.

He has really dove in where he can with his dads health. He has helped with lifting, adjusting equipment, vehicle transfers, and seeking out basic tasks like filling his water bottle before bed that he could possibly fulfill.

He gets excited about his stories, and takes jokes really well. He went on two missions trips this last year, and has been gone the vast majority of the summer and I MISS his face!!!

He is shamelessly himself, and I LOVE that about him. Dekker really does not desire to run with the crowd at all. He is his own guy, and I absolutely love who that guy is.

For the first time ever, I don’t get to see this boy on his birthday!!! 😩 His summer of bible camp wraps up tonight, but he gets to stay for the staff windup and debrief. I told him I hope someone gives him ice cream, sings to him, and also throws him into the pool. Just let him take his watch off first please 🤣

Happy birthday, Dekker Thomas. I love you so much. I can’t believe you’re already fifteen, but I’m not mad at it. I love who you are, and I love who you are becoming 💜

Ok now come home already!

It is hard to describe how I feel some days. Today is one of them.

I still wish radiation and daily home care was done with. I would so love if our schedule could be our own again. Some of those things are simple enough, and we can go through the motions, but even so, it would be nice to just not have to do them. You get it.

But then, we have a day like today.

Where the appointments are well timed and go off without a hitch.

Where all of the kids are where they belong, and they do well where they are, and everyone is happy.

Where you come home from the hospital to find fresh garden gifts and sunflowers in the kitchen.

Where your babies are well cared for, photographed, and in the cutest pajamas.

Where your best friend brews you coffee and cleans your house.

Where granny comes and swiftly assembles the new wheelchair so life can run that much smoother.

Where someone who you haven’t actually seen in person for years has a load of groceries delivered.

And another someone orchestrates the delivery of delicious baked breakfast items and yummy treats.

When your neighbour spends literal hours at your house performing back to school haircuts and colors, even going as far as trimming up Brady’s facial hair.

When the aforementioned neighbour serves up plates of supper for the kids as they wait for their fun colors to set. The supper that was brought to us c/o yet another family in town here.

How does anyone have this love?? I hear so many more stories of people who struggle and feel left and alone and abandoned. Who ARE all of you people?!?! What are you DOING here?? 😂😭 We are consistently humbled by the amount of love that is just poured into our family. It feels like so much more than we’ve ever given!

We are overwhelmed. But not by sickness or appointments or sorrow. No. We have true joy. Supernatural joy, and peace. Praise You, Lord! For you have done and continue to do GREAT things!!

Guys. I am SO grateful for every resource that has been sent our way. We are set up as comfortably as people in our position could possibly be. Which is an incredible thing to be able to say. I know so many don’t have it that good and we sure do.

With lots of needs comes lots of activity in this case, and today that meant three more appointments. The days are long, guys 😅 But they were all good appointments. Smooth appointments. Necessary. Well timed out. Crisis free appointments.

First, radiation. Because, maybe you’ve heard – Brady has cancer. 🤦‍♀️ While he was in treatment, I chatted with our friend-turned-social worker and did some brainstorming and laughing. It is SO nice to have people who are truly invested.

Second appointment was injections. Brady gets a botox-like injection into some of his muscles to help relax them. His leg muscles have gotten SO bad for tone. He can’t lay with his legs straight out. They bind up at the knees (think frog legs) and they spasm and twitch. They jump off the bed in the night, and they kick me when I try to adjust them. They’re meanies. So I got to meet Bradys physiatrist that does these injections. We chatted a little bit about the loss of use in Brady’s left arm, and he examined it, noting that his hand is quite curled and tight. He gave us the option of putting a little bit of relaxer in there as well, which we were really happy to accept. On the drive home after that appointment, Brady worked to open his fingers up and could tell they were already looser!

Appointment number three was home care. Home care changes every day, but today was someone we know pretty well and thoroughly enjoy. She called to touch base probably within five minutes of us arriving home. Perfect timing! Got him all taken care of before we ate some lunch and everyone napped. Meanwhile, Cher cleaned and brewed a pot of coffee while I crocheted and we chatted. It was truly lovely.

It was a great day. A productive day. So few bumps. Really only good stories 💜 It helps when you’re spending the day with your favorite person.

When the kids are away, the parents will play!

When the kids are in bed, the parents will eat cupcakes in their bed!

Thank you, Rae, for picking up some cupcakes for us at the farmers market yesterday 💜 What a fabulous treat!

If there ever was a time to eat treats, now feels like that time 😋 We’ve played a good few rounds of six cookies recently as well, but this one warranted a photo.

Shoutout to the sweet girly who bakes these for the market week after week. Not sure she’s on the internet, but she does a GREAT job!! 🧁 Give them a try!